Looking Back

Hey Everyone,

Since I left Jordan for the first time in the crazy snow day, it's been nearly three weeks. I spent one of them in Turkey (sorry, I'm not really gonna blog about it), and now I'm back in the beautiful bay area. The culture shock of traveling to Turkey and then America has given me a lot to reflect on when I think about wrapping up my time in Jordan.

Falling in love with Jordan 

I didn't expect to fall in love with Jordan. I expected to be in a state of constant tension, scared to be myself by openly talking about my background, religion, and perspectives on the controversial western neighbor. I expected that the people would treat me with disdain because of my American passport and give up on communicating with me because of my lack of Arabic skills. I could not have been more wrong. I was welcomed in with open arms and cups of overly-sweet tea, made to feel at home in a place so foreign in every way. 

Redefining My Relationship With the Arab World

When telling people why I came to Jordan, I explained that I wanted to get over my fear of people named Mohammad. Although a joke, I cannot deny that in a way, growing up in the Pro-Israel, Zionist, post 9/11 United States have given me a subconscious fear of Arab people. Living in Jordan reminded me of what I expected to learn--they are just people.  

Yes, I spent a lot of time laughing at their cultural anomalies. Yes, I constantly laughed at how ridiculous my day to day life was. But ultimately, I fell in love with a place that I add to the list of where I am proud to call home. I feel proud to be a part of the Arab world, and I never expected that I'd say that. I am not Arab, and I am not Muslim, but I feel a need to remind people just how wonderful Arabs and Muslims are, as the American media makes it increasingly difficult to remember this fact.

Yes, I had some very difficult conversations. I listened as a man told me why the Holocaust was a conspiracy theory, and another one told me that he sees no reason why Jews can't go back to Germany where they came from. I had many tell me that Israel will never be acceptable, with one telling me that if he got access to Israeli soldiers and a gun, it would look like "a playstation game." But even these people, those with views I find fairly vial, welcomed me into their homes and work places, respected me and my views, and force-fed me tea.

Redefining feminism, sexism, and cultural differences

While In Jordan, I learned a lot about Feminism and Sexism. Going in, I assumed that Jordanian/Arab women are repressed, and I came out thinking something very different. Women in Jordan aren't repressed. They don't go out a lot, they cover up their hair whenever they are around men that aren't a part of their immediate families blah blah blah. But they are happy. They have vibrant social lives, they are valued at home for taking care of their families, and a clear division of labor between husbands and wives makes houses fairly stable (I have a small sample size here, but my friends spoke of similar relationships between their parents).

There were cafes that were all men, including my favorite cafe right near my house. Even though I am clearly not a man, I was never turned away. A few times I was asked to turn around so a man didn't have to look at me, but I didn't mind. For some reason, the request felt reasonable. I was the bride's brother at the Bachelorette party.

Cultural Differences

It's the little things at home in the states that remind me I'm not in Jordan anymore. A lot of them have to do with the socioeconomic status of my family vs my host family, but many have to do with Jordan vs America. In no particular order:

• I put toilet paper in the toilet as opposed to a trash can next to it
• I understand things people say around me.
• I try to decide what to say to the guy in the airport that assumes the veiled woman on a cell phone is trying to blow something up in Chicago.
• Internet works round the clock, and everyone uses it round the clock.
• My house is massive, I have my own room, I have internet in it. I have showered three days in a row.
• My house has central heating. It's nice.
• No one understands me when I say Inshallah
• People find it funny, not normal, when I refer to His Glorious Majesty, King Abdullah II, may he reign forever, and talk about the king of Jordan, may he reign forever, in any way. 

Thanks to All of You

This semester has been among the most fascinating experiences of my life thus far, and I want to thank everyone that read this blog from the US, Jordan, Israel and anywhere else in the world. Next semester, I'll be in Israel doing the Peace and Conflict Studies program in Haifa, and I'll be keeping a blog. I'll post the link to Facebook as soon as I figure out what it'll be. 

Til next time, I wish you all the best, and a happy new year.

Becca